Tuesday, April 15, 2008

$18 an Hour.....And Rob Lowe Will Masturbate For You



I enjoy the nanny's reasoning for why she didn't report Rob Lowe's shocking, disgusting and obviously illegal behavior: "I really liked the kids, and I thought things would get better........and I was scared."

Um, which was it? You thought things would get better or you were scared? I mean, typically, if a male employer puts their hand down a female employee's pants and into her crotch, I kind of doubt that things are likely to get "better." In this case, the nanny claims that Lowe masturbated in her presence "repeatedly" and often asked her to touch his penis. Again, hey, someone jerks off in your presence once, most people leave. But exactly WHO would allow someone to do so "repeatedly"? What is the threshold here before you doubt things will improve? Six times? "Rob, I gotta tell you, I don't mind 4 or 5 times, but when you stripped naked and started bopping the baloney 2 feet from me the other day, I lost all hope that things would get better."

So, let's move on to "I was scared." Scared that......something WORSE would happen if you left? Imagine the phone calls home -- "Hey Mom. Yeah, work is going, um, OK..........you know, hand down there feeling up my crotch, lot of jerking off, wife says she will never get a boyfriend to F her.......but I know it could be a lot worse....."

Just make SOME excuse and get the hell out of there!! "I decided to go to school back in New York." Anything. I mean, when the man of the house asks you to evaluate his flaccid member, maybe not the #1 job you should be seeking, especially for $36,000 a year and no benefits. (I guess this tends to disprove the claim that Mexican nannies are taking jobs Americans won't do -- crap, Americans will do nanny jobs that require them to watch their female employer walk around naked repeatedly and watch their male employer "cuff the carrot" to climax repeatedly -- USA! USA!).

And finally, even as a lawyer I have to chuckle about the claim that she was underpaid for the job and didn't get proper rest breaks. I mean, hey, these are perfectly proper legal claims, but putting on my non-lawyer hat, it is kind of like the 400 pound guy who goes to a restaurant and says, "The food here is the worst I ever had........and the portions should be much larger......"

Great stuff.