Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Heat up 1 to 0

Hard to imagine that Dallas can score only 84 in a game. Shawn Marion could not miss, but Berea and Peja really sucked.

When Miami's bench outscores your bench you have no chance.

Note to ESPN - no one wants to see sportswriters asking questions. All questions should be handed to a scantily clad Erin Andrews who can read them aloud.

Couldn't Be Prouder

One search phrase driving some traffic to my Blog -- "kathy ireland ass":


Weekend Recap

Saw the K in Minneapolis (guy with arms crossed).

Tressel got the axe (boo-hoo).

Watched part of a Kelly Brook movie (black with shades).

Watched the SUPER creepy movie "The Babysitter's Seduction" starring a very young Keri Russell. (see guy from 7th Heaven helping her into her towel).

Oh -- Kung Fu Panda 2 -- 7 out of 10. Decent.

That is about it.

Friday, May 27, 2011

Pippen Is Wrong -- LeBron Is Not Better Than Jordan


You will almost never hear a bad word about LeBron James here, but come on Scottie. Take it easy a little here.

Under any overall statistical comparison, Michael was not only a better scorer, he was a better overall player. PER is higher, shooting percentage is higher, steals plus blocks is higher, and Jordan had won titles by his 8th year in the league -- which LeBron has not yet.

Even if you take Michael's ENTIRE career (including 2 years in Washington) and use all of the numbers, his stats are still better than LeBron's -- better PER in regular season and playoffs, better shooter, more steals plus blocks, bigger spread between offensive rating and defensive rating, better win shares and win shares per 48 in the playoff and the regular season.

I hold no ill will whatsoever toward LeBron -- he is my favorite NBA player. But he just is not quite the player Jordan was. He is probably statistically closer than anyone has ever been, but he just is not quite that player.

Bob Pettit Footage

I also determined he reached the finals 4 times and won once (scoring 50 points in game 6 of that series).

So, yeah, probably better than Dirk, but also watch his footage -- he is bigger than almost everyone and likes to shoot from outside. Just like Dirk.

LeBron Reaches Second NBA Final -- How Does That Compare to Other Greats?

I am going to just use the "most MVP shares" list from basketball-reference.com to list the 64 greatest players of all-time. My head hurts when I try to parse the rankings of, say, Moses, KG and David Robinson.

My verdict -- LeBron with a championship could make a good argument that he belongs at the bottom of the top 10 group, displacing Karl Malone.

So here goes -- LeBron, 2 finals, 0 titles so far.

1. Michael Jordan* 8.138 -- 6 finals, 6 titles.

2. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar* 6.203 -- wow, er, I think it is like 8 finals and 6 titles, but I am not gonna look it up.

3. Larry Bird* 5.693 -- 5 and 3, I think.

4. Magic Johnson* 5.129 -- 7 and 5?

5. Bill Russell* 4.827 -- 10 and 10?

6. Shaquille O'Neal 4.380 -- 6 and 4, I am pretty sure

7. Karl Malone* 4.296 -- 2 and 0

8. Wilt Chamberlain* 4.269 -- I would guess 5 and 2, might be like 6 and 2

9. Tim Duncan 4.205 -- 4 and 4, right?

10. Kobe Bryant 3.763 -- 7 and 5

Top 10 -- guy who stands out like a sore thumb -- Karl Malone. Everyone else has at least 2 titles and at least 4 finals appearances.

11. LeBron James 3.502 -- 2 and 0

12. David Robinson* 3.123 -- 2 and 2

13. Moses Malone* 2.873 - 2 and 1

14. Kevin Garnett 2.752 -- depends if you count the year he was hurt, so either 1 and 1 or 2 and 1

15. Bob Pettit* 2.628 -- I know he has a title, so I am guessing 4 and 1 since he played against Russell's Celts but I imagine St. Louis was in the East

16. Hakeem Olajuwon* 2.611 -- 3 and 2

17. Oscar Robertson* 2.479 -- 1 and 1?

18. Charles Barkley* 2.438 - 1 and 0

19. Steve Nash 2.423 -- 0 and 0

20. Jerry West* 2.090 -- 6 and 1, maybe?

21. Dirk Nowitzki 1.801 - 2 and 0 so far -- win would really help his historical value.

It is really interesting -- this second group (which I will put as 11-21) has an ENORMOUS drop off from the top group. These are all great, great players, but their career playoff success is light years behind the first group of 10 (except Karl Malone) leading one to the conclusion that Karl Malone.......really does not belong in the top group....

22. Elgin Baylor* 1.659 -- was Baylor around for 1972? I will guess 1 and 1

23. Allen Iverson 1.567 - 1 and 0

24. Bob McAdoo* 1.494 -- 2 and 2? Was benching for Lakers at the time.

25. Patrick Ewing* 1.424 -- 1 and 0

26. Julius Erving* 1.407 -- 3 and 1

27. Dave Cowens* 1.338 -- 3 and 3? Maybe 2 and 2?

28. Dwight Howard 1.239 -- 1 and 0

29. Willis Reed* 1.073 -- 2 and 1?

30. Derrick Rose 0.977 -- 0 and 0

31. Alonzo Mourning 0.968 -- 1 and 1, right? He was a Heat in 2006 I think.

Let's stop here -- in this group the only guy to LEAD his team to the title was Cowens. The other guys with titles were not the stars of the team when they won.

32. Jason Kidd 0.933 -- 3 and 0 so far -- Kidd has a chance to move up a group.

33. George Gervin* 0.911 -- 0 and 0

34. Bob Cousy* 0.882 -- 8 and 8?

35. Chris Paul 0.866 -- 0 and 0

36. Tracy McGrady 0.855 -- 0 and 0

37. Dominique Wilkins* 0.849 - 0 and 0

38. Gary Payton 0.823 -- 2 and 1

39. Dwyane Wade 0.784 -- 2 and 1

40. Clyde Drexler* 0.778 -- 3 and 1

41. Scottie Pippen* 0.716 -- 6 and 6

A group of very good players, some great talents, but guys who either were falling just short, or guys who were second bananas. Wade, if he goes up to 2 titles, has to really be considered as moving up a group.

42. Sidney Moncrief 0.695 - 0 and 0

43. Dolph Schayes* 0.690 -- no idea

44. Kevin Durant 0.652 - 0 and 0

45. Wes Unseld* 0.639 -- 2 and 1

46. Bernard King 0.625 - 0 and 0

47. Rick Barry* 0.592 - 1 and 1

48. Chris Webber 0.588 -- 0 and 0

49. Elvin Hayes* 0.571 - 2 and 1

50. Grant Hill 0.529 - 0 and 0

51. Bill Walton* 0.522 - 2 and 2

52. Bob Lanier* 0.504 - 0 and 0

53. Paul Arizin* 0.495 -- no idea

54. Tiny Archibald* 0.465 - 1 and 1, I think

55. Jermaine O'Neal 0.425 - 0 and 0

56. Dave Bing* 0.386 - 0 and 0

57. George Yardley* 0.382 -- no idea

This is a pretty bleak stretch -- 16 guys, I can only remember 8 finals apperanaces and 6 titles.

58. Chauncey Billups 0.375 -- 2 and 1? 1 and 1? Yikes, I am losing my mind.

59. Nate Thurmond* 0.370 -- no idea

60. Anfernee Hardaway 0.341 - 1 and 0

61. Kevin McHale* 0.339 -- same as Bird

62. Tim Hardaway 0.336 - 1 and 1, he was a Heat, I think?

63. Lenny Wilkens* 0.323 -- no idea

64. Isiah Thomas* 0.318 -- 3 and 2

This group actually had more success than the prior group. How about Isiah having .318 MVP shares for his whole career!!?!?! gary Payton and tracy McGrady, way, way higher.

Scotty McReery -- What, Me, Worry?

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Non-Phil Jackson Triangle Offense Head Coaches - 109 Wins, 392 Losses

Jim Cleamons -- 28-70 Dallas

Tim Floyd -- 49-190 Chicago

Kurt Rambis -- 32-132 Minnesota

Can we please put a merciful end to this offense, whose primary design is to get people out of the way and get your star the ball with 6 seconds on the shot clock?

Winning roughly 22% of your games means the teams forced to run this offense without Michael, Pippen, Shaq or Kobe had a typical season record of 18-64. Rambis's annualized record is 16-66. Jim Cleamons' was actually WAY better (around 28% wins, so 23-59) and Floyd's????? Well, again, around 17-65.

Scott Skiles: The good thing is you have a lot of ball movement and player movement in your offense. The bad thing is you have a lot of ball movement and player movement in your offense,'' the Bucks coach said. "The ball ends up in somebody's hands with five seconds left on the shot clock that you don't want to have the ball. When you have the great bailout players, they can just go manufacture shots at the end of it, it makes it all look good.''

Supreme Court Allows States To Add Licensing Enforcement to Federal Law


You know that immigration is a bizarre field when the plaintiffs in an action include the U.S. Chamber of Commerce and "various civil rights organizations."

I, frankly, do not see anything wrong with Judge Roberts' analysis. The federal government allows states to make licensing decisions -- Arizona made a licensing decision. The federal government has a system to make sure you are not hiring illegal aliens -- Arizona tells employers to use that system.

Why does the Chamber of Commerce want the Arizona law struck down? Because it knows that its members hire a shitload of illegal aliens, and it knows the federal government generally cannot do much to prevent that (because, quite frankly, federal politicians are beholden to large corporate donors).

So when AZ politicians might actually start cracking down on violations of federal law by shutting down businesses? End of the world. Federal government is our friend and must control everything related to business in this regard -- a rather hilarious position for the Chamber to take.

You can count this as a HUGE victory for the Tea Baggers, who love states rights and who hate people of color. The Roberts Court, for once, makes a decision AGAINST the interests of big business, while the 4 liberal justices say "Go ahead big business, break the law all you want...."

It is really "Through the Looking Glass" stuff.

Mike Brown to Lakers -- Kobe "Surprised" and "Not Involved"

The source close to the Lakers told SI.com that Kobe Bryant was "surprised" by the news of the team's interest in Brown late Tuesday, and that he was not a part of the decision-making process. Bryant had been a staunch supporter of Lakers assistant Brian Shaw for the position.

Mike Brown (my close personal friend -- I sat next to him at an AAU game in Indiana once) is a pretty big and strong guy. Maybe he will just actually challenge Kobe to a fight and see who is the better man.

If not, look for Mike Brown to check into the hospital with mental health issues by January 2012.

Lakers on offense will now run "24 stand" versus the "23 stand" brown used to run in Cleveland.


Sorry Rick Carlisle, There Are Players Similar to Dirk

1 Karl Malone* 6-9 1986 2004 25.0 10.1 3.6
2 Dirk Nowitzki 7-0 1999 2011 23.0 8.4 2.7
3 Larry Bird* 6-9 1980 1992 24.3 10.0 6.3
4 Bob Pettit* 6-9 1955 1965 26.4 16.2 3.0
5 Bob McAdoo* 6-9 1973 1986 22.1 9.4 2.3

Carlisle notes that there is no one similar to Dirk "because Dirk is 7 feet tall" -- um, OK, if all you are talking about is height you could go with Bargnani or Lohaus, but I assumed when you called Dirk a "Top 10 all-time player" you were referring to the claim that no one has ever put up similar stats as a big forward.

Not so -- Bird, Malone and Petit were all big forwards who had better scoring, rebounding and assist stats. Bird played primarily outside. I guess I should watch some Bob Petit game film, because MY LORD he must have been great. My recollection is that he was a multi-talented player.

McAdoo, as I have said before, is the closest match for Dirk from how he played to how Dirk plays. Deadly shooter, good-not-great rebounder, mediocre assist man. McAdoo also had to play center for the Braves.

Rick Barry, by the by, has similar stats to Dirk and played the game similarly to Dirk, but he gets sorted out because he could not achieve 8 rebounds a game. Remarkably, the ultra-selfish Barry was actually a far better assist man than Dirk and his assist numbers actually trail only Bird.

Kevin Garnett, by the way -- 19.5/10.7/4.1 -- so not the scorer Dirk has been, but a better rebounder, assist man, and defender.

Chris Webber -- 20.8/9.8/4.2 -- another similar player.

Dirk's greatest strength (similar to Karl Malone) is his ability to continue to be a scorer despite advancing age. After Webber turned 30, he averaged 20 a game once. With Garnett it is also one and done. Dirk has already had 3 seasons.

Karl Malone -- 10 seasons with 20+ points a game after turning 30. Wow.

Want Abigail Breslin To Work for a Week? That'll Be $275,000.


Plus $100,000 extra if the film does well, plus $40,000 a day for re-dos.

While this sounds bad, there are numerous examples of big name stars doing 1-7 days of work on a film and getting millions. So Breslin, possibly, may actually be a bargain.


Mavericks Outscore Thunder At End of Games 4 and 5 by a score of 32-8

So the Mavs advance, great. I get to watch fucking Mark Cuban take one step closer to a title.

A new Twins hat is on the line tonight as TEG wins it if the Heat finishes off the Bulls.

Given the Twins' record, I would think the bargain bin would be full of Twins caps -- so the loss of the bet, if it occurs, will only cost me $3 or so.


Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Why I Love Iran and Iranians

1) They read my Blog.

2) They are non-violent and god-fearing people.

3) They have a good sense of humor.

4) They understand that sometimes I kid, I kid because I love.

5) They have come to praise HM, not to bury him.

Greatest Statistical Seasons -- PER over 30


4 Jordans
3 Wilts
2 LeBrons
2 Shaqs
1 McGrady
1 David
1 Wade

Over 31 -- 4 MJ, 3 Wilt, 2 LeBron

Over 32 -- never been done

25 Points, 6 Assists and 6 Rebounds in a Season

http://bkref.com/tiny/Zaf4g Done 26 times.

Rick Barry -- 1
Larry Bird -- 4
Clyde - 1
Richie Guerin - 1
Havlicek - 2
LeBron - 7
MJ - 3
Oscar - 7
Jerry West - 1

Let's go up 2 points, 1 rebound and 1 assist:

Bird - 1
Havlicek - 2
Oscar - 6
LeBron - 4
MJ - 1

Let's go to 29-8-8: Jordan once, Oscar 4 times.

31-9-9 -- just Oscar. Oscar, of course, also is the only guy to ever average a triple double, going

Just sick, sick stuff. Pippen (1987 draftee and Hall of Famer) never scored more than 22 in a season.

A Public Service -- NSFW


Since every time I had to click on the "he is enormous" or "he is a tireless sex machine" link, I really did not get to see a lot of the possible choices.....but I am sure you folks will differ.

NY-26, My Old Congressional District, Goes DEMOCRAT!?!?

Jane Corwin loses in a special election yesterday. This is astounding.

I thought Indiana and NC going Obama was remarkable, but certainly it is nothing compared to this.

You should be able to run an absolute nobody in upstate NY and win this seat. It is about a 60% GOP district, maybe 30% Dem and 10% "independent" -- that 10% basically being Republicans who hate everyone so they won't say they are Republicans.

So, you take a district where you have 70% Republicans, to get under 50% of the vote you really really need to suck.

The big problem for Republicans? The fact that they are all saying they support Paul Ryan's plan to end Medicare, give old people $15,000 worth of health insurance, and dedicate the savings to more tax cuts for people making over $250,000 a year. How is that plan going for them? Ask Jane Corwin and these folks:

Indeed, the GOP has been doing plenty of grappling lately, but it's been mostly with constituents and members of the party. Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich was browbeaten by his party for calling the Medicare plan "right-wing social engineering" and endorsing Paul Ryan's budget, which includes Medicare reform as its signature component and has become a litmus test for candidates.

At home, Republicans have faced hostile town halls with seniors questioning how they'll be able to purchase private insurance with a voucher that doesn't rise at the rate of health care costs. At a recent town hall, a constituent of Rep. Rob Woodall (R-Ga.) raised a practical obstacle to obtaining coverage in the private market within the confines of an employer-based health insurance system: What happens when you retire?

Woodall told the woman, basically -- shut your fucking mouth and stop whining. Just get another fucking job you low-life oldster and stop suckling off government health care (you know, like Congress has).

By the time the GOP figures out how stupid Ryan's plans are, they may be facing complete annihilation at the ballot box.

Good lord, guys, at least take the proposed savings and apply it to the deficit. Right? When I tell my kid he has to get through the season with his current catchers glove, I don't then turn around and say "so I can get my garage floor paved in gold leaf."

Can We Please, At Least Now, Do Away With the Fantasy That Kobe Is Better Than LeBron?


Look at the PER, assists, rebounds, shooting percentage, minutes played, Win Shares, Offensive rating, Defensive rating.....etc, etc.

Folks, it is not even close.


LBJ -- 27 PER, 117 offensive rating, 100 defensive rating

The Devil -- 21 PER, 105 offensive rating, 110 defensive rating.

Can we put an end to this love of Kobe crap?

Well, that is not fair, what if you compared the two guys through, say, exactly 627 regular season games played.


Oops, things do not get any better for Kobe.

Well, how about entire career versus entire career: http://bkref.com/tiny/n9ffQ

Unless your goal for a player is to be a slightly better free throw shooter than someone else, James has been a far, far better player in every other category, AND LeBron's Offensive and Defensive rating numbers in the playoffs stay level or actually improve, while the Devil's.........do not.

Sorry, folks. LeBron is just a better player -- he just never got to be coached by Phil Jackson or play with a young Shaq.

LeBron Note

Note that LeBron James has taken to calling Derrick Rose "MVP." This is the sign of a bitter, bitter man who is pissed that someone would think another player is better than Mr. James.

All good players either take real slights or invent perceived slights to drive them to higher levels. In round 1 James had Delonte West to hate, now he has the whole "I am the real MVP" mantra to drive him through.

If I end up owing TEG a hat, I guess maybe LeBron will have to note that basketball-reference.com has Dirk ranked higher on their Elo ratings. That may do the trick.

By the way -- see entry above.

Kris Humphries -- Engaged


20.5 carats? Don't you have to wear that in a chain around your neck? What is that? $1MM???

After another tough Nets loss, Kris can look forward to that butt to relieve his stress for 45 seconds or so.

NBA draft facts

Since 1987 draft there have only been 2 guys drafted who are in the Hall of Fame currently. That is 24 years ago. That surprised me some but it will also tell you something about the 1988 1988 1990 and 1991 drafts

Shaq who apparently wants to play until he dies, will not be Hall eligible probably before my son gets married.

Anyone name the two HOF guys drafted from 1987 to today?

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Back To Minnesota

So I made my brother go in and snore next to my dad, closed the door, then slept from 2 until 5:45. Got up, showered, ate, went to my old school, did 8 interview (all awesome kids).

Gave out the scholarship winner's name (announced at graduation) then back to the Buffalo airport. Stopped by my old house, where there are now 1,000 windmills within 5 miles of the house.

My old house -- um, not the best. We had a beautiful rail fence out front -- gone. Paved semi-circle drive -- gone.

Then back to Buffalo, my 7:20 flight -- delayed........until 10:50. Which would not be so bad, except the airport ran a video presentation on Buffalo two gates away. The loop had only 4 songs total, one of which was "Slide" by the Goo Goo Dolls. I now despise that song.

Some pics of where I grew up. Look at this photograph, every time I do it makes me laugh.........this is where I went to school, most of the time had better things to do.........this is where I grew up, I guess the present owner fixed it up.......or no they didn't.

Dirk Wins My Poll As Best Player Born Outside U.S.

He gets 16 votes to Hakeem's 14. This goes to prove that you should never allow players to be evaluated based upon popular vote.

I see the correct answer as Hakeem, then Duncan just behind (Duncan could be #1), then probably Ewing, with Dirk a 3rd or 4th choice.

Oh well, thanks to the 43 folks who voted.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

What a title would mean to The Legacy of Dirk or LeBron

Go to basketball-reference,com and search for players with over 80 playoff games, a playoff PER over 19 and at least 0.1 win shares per 48 minutes played.

There are 39 guys. Now sort by greatest win shares per 48. Number 1 - Jordan. Number 2 - LeBron. Number 3 - Dirk.

Yet should Dirk and/or LeBron lose again, they will be deemed non-winners and history will so note that fact.

Should either win the title, he moves way up the all-time list of greatest NBA players. Dirk to top 20. LeBron arguably to top 10.

So a shitload is riding on these next 10 games for both guys.

My out if continental us poll

I think the answer to that poll is either Hakeem or Tim Duncan - those men have a total of 6 NBA titles. Dirk has zero. Those two guys have better rebounding and assist stats than Dirk and their defensive stats are frighteningly good. Dirk simply is not in their class as a defender.

Hakeem's career steals plus blocks number is off the charts, but Duncan actually has a better overall defensive rating than Hakeem.

Here is an interesting fact - toss in KG to this group of three and you will see that statistically Kevin's numbers per game jut do not match up statistically. He is the 4th guy in the group statistically.

Now part of that is KG played for shitty teams when he was young and once he reached a good team he was not as good, but I think history will not treat Kevin as kindly as it treats Duncan and Hakeem (and Dirk if he gets a title).

Up late with no chance of sleep entry

Played some cards with my parents and siblings. Went to dinner at 5. Had beef on kimmelweck. Oh go was it awesome.

Had one of my brother's wings - again, awesome upstate ny delicacy.

Back home by 630. Asleep on the couch by 7. Slept through 9. Then went to bed. My dad - snoring so loud the paint was peeling. Up at 1040. Tried to go to the living room where my brother is sleeping. Almost asleep - he starts snoring like a jet engine taking off.

Karma, I guess, is a real bitch. All of the people tortured by my snoring through the years are laughing their asses off at me - and that is the sound I actually hear. I tried sleeping in the bathtub. You can hear my brother through the wall. And he has no bathroom fan (how is that possible?).

So I figured watch the end of the Heat Bulls tilt - nope. He has no cable. So I am, to put it mildly, out of luck.

It is 1220 and I cannot sleep. So I shaved. WTF ? Might as well. 630 am I need to be on the road to interview 8 kids for one scholarship. Good crew this year. One old classmate's kid. Kid's other parent must be Stephen Hawking if my old classmate is a parent and this kid is top 10 in the class.

I guess Chris Bosh actually did something tonight. With that miracle already accomplished I guess God is too tired to stop the snoring here for 30 minutes so I might drift off to sleep!!!


Now that I made it to Atlanta (9am 76 degrees) I am literally no closer to upstate NY than I was at 3am when I awoke. The flight from here is two hours and 8 minutes. My canceled flight direct to Buffalo was scheduled for 2 hours.

But at least all their terminals have power.

I am in terminal T. It has a smoking room. Good God. This is basically what I picture Hell to be like. Folks sitting slumped over in a cloud of smoke, knowing they are Harming themselves and others with every breath.

Oh well. Looking at my fellow travelers to upstate. We are NOT a good looking people, we upstate NY folk.

It's 433 a.m. And I must be lonely.

There is a line of 20 people awaiting and they just announced that the flight is overbooked. 300 Delta Dollars if you get bumped.

Uh. No.

Honeymooners are going to Jamaica. Ok. No further comment. Hope they have a seat.

Jesse James now begins to look like he is plotting to commit a crime - eyes darting wildly side to side. Are you a Nazi? "no. I have been to Israel". And "that picture was taken 10 years ago". Ok. The Nazis were thought of much more highly back then.

Despite the fact that we are less than a month from the solstice it is pitch dark outside.

Day 2 of My Travel Attempt - the Triangle Trade

No, I am not trading in rum, molasses or slaves (look it up folks - or watch 1776 the musical). I am trying to get to upstate NY again and my best option is to take a 520 flight through Atlanta. So after a 3am wakeup (thanks Accounting Maven) I am at the gate hoping all goes well.

It rained around 3 inches yesterday at my house. Rained hard for 12 straight hours. So hopefully I can leave these storms behind. Saw a couple with shirts that say "bride" and "groom". The woman is about 5 foot 2 and 165 at least. Glad age slimmed down for the wedding. The guy is 6 foot 3 and muscular. Good looking guy. Everyone is saying "congrats" to them. She always says thank you. He never does. I think that makes a lot of sense

At 4am the world is barely waking up. 500 people slept at the airport last night, so I guess I an glad I could go home. Though I barely slept.

Listening to Piers Morgan interview Jesse James on CNN. Talk about a guy who is completely full of shit. My lord - it is hard to watch this without vomiting.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

More Orbitz customer service

So I tell my ZIP Code. "ok, I will call Delta and see what I can do. I will put you on hold". So why did I call orbitz if they have to call Delta? Well they probably have a hot line to delta. I will get better customer service.

3, 5, 10 minutes -- comes back -- "yes sir - I Am still on hold with Delta". Arg. 20 minutes on hold.

"your flight is on time. I cannot change it". No sir. It is canceled. "it shows as being confirmed and on time". It is canceled - the airport terminals are closed.

"well, it shows as confirmed and on time". It is canceled.

"well, I can put you on a 315 flight on standby". (it is 305).

Can't you rebook me?

"you can buy a new ticket. Would you like to buys new ticket?". You are kidding - right?

"no sir. You have an on-time confirmed flight. There is nothing I can do"

I hang up.

3 minutes later - call "this is orbitz automated service. Your 305 pm flight to Buffalo. Has been canceled.".


My Orbitz Customer Service Nightmare.

So, as you will see below, my flight was canceled. I had booked the flight through Orbitz.

I think - well, Delta customer service will be jammed so I will use Orbitz. I should have,instead, given the woman behind me in line a baseball bat and let her hit me in the lower back three times. I would have felt better and at least she would have done what I said.

I get a guy on the phone whose name I did not catch, but he was a reject from "Outsourced". You could understand 80 percent of what he said, maybe. He asked for my 15 character confirmation number (which I somehow had). He then wanted my seek code. Seek code? Yes - seek code. Um do you mean seat code? No Zeke code. What is a Zeke code? No. Zeet code. I don't have a seat code. How cN you not have a seet code? Don't you have an address? Oh a ZIP code.

Travel log - part 2.

Some idiot cut the power at terminals a b. C and D. So- everything is canceled. My best choice - through Atlanta tomorrow at 5 am. Fucking a.

The incompetence of the airport and the airline was remarkable (not compared to Orbitz which will get its own entry but still pretty bad). Note -- this reminds me of when Milhouse's dad Kirk was being arrested and Chief Wiggum said "you are going away to some place dirty and awful -- ok not nearly as awful as this apartment, but still pretty bad".

They had canceled all flights from 4 terminals - still showed them as on time and at their old gates.

They allowed people to walk down to their proposed gates. All you had to do was pull a rope line across the hall and post one person to say "all flights canceled". Nope.

They could have sent people out front to ticketing here they had 100 agents available - nope. Want help? Go to F1 or F2 or G10. I kid you not - the line was 600 people long at G10. At the end of the line?? 2 agents.

They offered a Hotel voucher - but no reservation. Oh. And the voucher covered the hotel bill.....all but 79 dollars.

The whole thing was amazingly awful. The line for a hotel voucher was 2 hours long.

All of this was such a remarkable fuck up, but I felt like aa VIP at a 5 star hotel compared to my experience with Orbitz.


Trip to Upstate NY Travel log

Perhaps an ominous few signs as I go out to hand out the scholarship to one lucky high schooler:

1) interstate was closed. Why? Not said.

2) just got a calm from Otbitz - entire airport has a power outage. "this may impact your flight schedule".

Might be hard to check in.

Well on the plus side I do have a direct flight to Buffalo. So at least I don't have a connection to miss.

Arg. I also have an extra full day o cushion built in going this way. So they should be able to get me to upstate NY some way. Right?

Friday, May 20, 2011

NBA Draft Combine Heights and Weights


Jimmer Fredette -- under 6'1". My son is about 6'1 1/2 inches -- dominates Jimmer in height.

Kyle Singler -- wanna know why his stock is so low? Small hands, short arms, not much for reach. He is, surprisingly, a pretty tall guy in bare feet.

Tristan Thompson -- why was he better in high school? Oh yeah, he was actually TALL for a high schooler.....

As I thought when I watched on TV -- Kyrie Irving is bigger than Nolan Smith.

Randy Savage - Dead at 58

Word is heart attack while driving. The circumstances sound rather unlike a heart attack, but we will go with that for now.

Combing charisma and wrestling ability, Savage was a top 20 wrestler.

Also a great baseball player.


Killibrew Funeral Going on now

First speaker - "friendship is sort of a miracle...of all of the thousands of people you meet in your life, only a few become your close friends.".

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The End for Sarah Palin -- Her Looks Are Going

Hot, still pretty hot, and ......uh oh!

Look, I realize that time steals beauty from everyone (I did not even have much to give, and even that is all gone) but when your sole skill as a politician is that tea bagger guys want to fuck you and call you a MILF and GILF, you cannot look like the lady there in the Fox News pic.

YIKES!! Only 3 years and THIS is the decline!?!? Maria Shriver with better hair??

Barack Obama -- No Personal Debt



Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Mark Salter on Rick Santorum

Mildred "Patty" Baena in 1996 -- Yikes! Still Not Good.

Kyrie Irving Game Log

I have watched many, many Duke basketball games in the past 25 years. Generally when you watch a game as a Duke fan you recognize that guys have significant shortcomings. Ferry was a limited athlete, Laettner was a medicore defender and had no post moves, Battier was limited offensively, Mike Dunleavy was horribly overrated, as was Shelden Williams. Jason Williams was great until he faced a bunch of big guys inside. Same with Redick.

There are very few guys who I have ever watched at Duke who I said, "My lord, this guy is great!" Elton Brand, Grant Hill, that is about it. Those two dominated basically every phase of the game and were always the best player on the court.

In the games I watched Kyrie Irving play -- he was the best guy on the court. When things got bad and went all to hell, you just gave him the ball and he would get a hoop or an assist. Here is his game log:

11/14 Princeton W 97-60 25 4 10 6 6 3 6 17 1 3 4 9
11/16 Miami (OH) W 79-45 19 3 4 6 7 1 2 13 2 3 5 2
11/19 Colgate W 110-58 25 5 9 0 0 3 5 13 1 2 3 9
11/22 @Marquette W 82-77 34 4 9 2 3 1 4 11 1 1 2 7
11/23 @Kansas St W 82-68 31 5 12 7 7 0 2 17 0 5 5 6
11/27 @Oregon W 98-71 27 6 11 3 3 1 3 16 1 2 3 2
12/1 Mich St W 84-79 36 8 12 13 16 2 31 0 6 6 4
12/4 Butler W 82-70 34 6 10 6 6 3 6 21 0 2 2 2


3/18 Hampton W 87-45 20 4 8 4 4 2 2 14 0 4 4 1
3/20 Michigan W 73-71 21 1 4 9 10 0 2 11 0 3 3 2
3/24 Arizona L 93-77 31 9 15 8 9 2 4 28 0 0 0 3

Worst game pre-injury? Probably Marquette - 11 points, 7 assists, 2 rebounds. Shot 44% and only 25% from 3.

Worst game post-injury -- Michigan, 11-2-3. shot 25%

Irving had 4 games against good competition where he played over 30 minutes. His numbers:


Pretty damn impressive.

The Handi-Quacks

Saw the episode again the other night -- HOW IS THIS SHOW NOT ON TV!!?!?!?

Mildred "Patty" Baena -- Arnold's Mistress/Baby Momma

The kid is apparently 14 -- it will not be long now until we get pics.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Wednesday Through Friday -- NBA Draft Combine


The big questions, I think, will be how tall Kyrie Irving and Derrick Williams are without shoes.

If Irving measures 6'1" or under, there will be questions about his size when coupled with the fact that he is not blazing fast like John Wall.

If Williams measures 6'7" or better without shoes, he will be in the 1 v. 2 debate all draft period. If he is 6'5" or 6'6" look for a lot of foreign big men to shoot past him on the big board.

We shall wait for reports.

"I Have a Delivery For the Governor!"

Oh, I bet they did!

Why I Like Audrina Patridge

Not for her Mensa-like IQ or her tremendous TV show, but:


Arnold Schwarzenegger. -- Fertile


Noted Arnold -- "Look, my character in "Twins" got to bang a young Kelly Preston, in "True Lies" I made Jamie Lee Curtis strip for me......and then I go home and I am married to Skelator. WTF?"

I, as you might expect, am outraged by Arnold's comments....oh wait, they are mine? Nevermind.

Monday, May 16, 2011

FINALLY!! An Honest Republican candidate!!


Currently running in my old home district to replace the guy who took the shirtless cell phone pic.

No mention yet about her decision to have her chief of staff follow the 78 year old Tea Party candidate around with a video camera until the guy got so flummoxed he lightly brushed the COS, causing the COS to flop so quickly that Vlade Divac and Manu Ginobili both registered their disgust, along with numerous European soccer strikers.

Donald Trump -- Pre-Quitter


"Running for President cannot be done halfheartedly" -- he hasn't seen Fred Thompson or Tim Pawlenty campaign, has he?

Dirk -- Around 26th Best player

In the most popular poll in the site's history, Dirk gets 28 votes at 26 or lower and 22 at 25 or higher.

Minnesota Sports Teams -- The Worst Ever Since 1961


On more depressing news -- the paper reports people in Ramsey County have found out that they can stop the Vikings stadium by just getting 25,000 signatures and putting it on the ballot.

Here is how I suggest the ballot question by phrased:

"In Ramsey County, we have an old army dump laden with toxins and carcinogens in a town few even knew existed until around a month ago. The State of Minnesota and Zygi Wilf's family are willing to spend about $2 billion on roads, a stadium, and a lot of commercial and residential development at this shithole, if you will just pay $10.05 every time you take your cousin-wife to McDonald's for the next 30 years, rather than your current $10. Will you agree to that?"


___ Yes, of course, I am not a moron.

___ No, because Ramsey County badly needs a polluted former army munitions dump.


Bin Laden -- Huge Porn Fan???

Some of the still frames are included in this post.

Dick Welts, Former Ball Boy -- Gay


Honest to God? Your name is Dick Welts, your former occupation is "ball boy" - you are the first gay hoops executive. Couldn't be John Smith who used to work at McDonald's?

Suns leadership -- gay.

Bulls Win -- My Quest for a Free Rockies Hat is 3 Wins Away

I have bet TEG that the Bulls will win the series. One down, three to go.

TEG might actually be "winning" because who the hell really wants to win a Twins hat (12-26, lost 8 straight) anyway?

Taj Gibson dunk on Wade:


Friday, May 13, 2011

By the By

Kobe -- first team all-defense??? Really???

Kobe's defensive rating -- 105 (lower is better, Dwight Howard's is like 93)

Chris Paul -- 103
Dwyane Wade -- 102
Tony Allen -- 101

Kobe steals plus blocks per 36 minutes played -- 1.5 (his worst performance ever)

Paul -- 2.4
Wade - 2.5
Tony Allen -- 4.1
Ronnie Brewer 2.5 (defensive rating of 98).

Howard -- I looked it up, his rating is 94
Garnett -- 95
James -- 102
Kobe -- 105
Rondo -- 100

So, toss out Kobe, insert Wade, and you did a great job of selecting the team. Same with 1st team all-NBA.

Comments on the 2010-11 All-NBA Team

The complete First, Second and Third team selections are below:

•First team

F — LeBron James, Miami (119) 595 -- sure

F — Kevin Durant, Oklahoma City (69) 492 -- sure

C — Dwight Howard, Orlando (118) 593 -- sure

G — Kobe Bryant, L.A. Lakers (98) 551 – um, doubtful, see below

G — Derrick Rose, Chicago (118) 593 -- sure

•Second team

F — Pau Gasol, L.A. Lakers (2) 259 – fortunately voting closed before playoffs began

F — Dirk Nowitzki, Dallas (47) 437 -- sure

C — Amar’e Stoudemire, New York (2) 258 -- paucity of centers

G — Dwyane Wade, Miami (24) 392 – he should have taken Kobe’s spot. http://bkref.com/tiny/zeqJo

Wade and Kobe the same across the board, except Wade is a better percentage shooter, better rebounder and far more productive defender.

G — Russell Westbrook, Oklahoma City 184 -- sure

•Third team

F — LaMarcus Aldridge, Portland 135 – yes, could be ahead of Gasol

F — Zach Randolph, Memphis —67 – had a great year

C — Al Horford, Atlanta —62 -- wow. 6’9” center who scores like 15 a night makes all-NBA team.

G — Manu Ginobili, San Antonio 106 – I guess someone from Spurs had to make it.

G — Chris Paul, New Orleans 157 -- sure

Other players receiving votes, with point totals: Rajon Rondo, Boston, 68; Paul Pierce, Boston, 55; Carmelo Anthony, Denver-New York, 53; Kevin Love, Minnesota, 48; Tim Duncan, San Antonio, 43; Blake Griffin, L.A. Clippers, 36; Tony Parker, San Antonio, 27; Kevin Garnett, Boston, 22; Deron Williams, Utah-New Jersey 19; Steve Nash, Phoenix, 17; Andrew Bogut, Milwaukee, 13; Monta Ellis, Golden State, 11; Nene, Denver, 11; Andrew Bynum, L.A. Lakers, 9; Kevin Martin, Houston, 7; Tyson Chandler, Dallas, 7; Joakim Noah, Chicago, 5; Marc Gasol, Memphis, 3; Al Jefferson, Utah, 3; Kendrick Perkins, Boston-Oklahoma City, 3; Andrea Bargnani, Toronto, 2; Chris Bosh, Miami, 2; Andre Iguodala, Philadelphia, 1; Emeka Okafor, New Orleans, 1; Eric Gordon, L.A. Clippers, 1; Gerald Wallace, Charlotte-Portland, 1; Jason Kidd, Dallas, 1; Luis Scola, Houston, 1; Luol Deng, Chicago, 1; Ray Allen, Boston, 1.

You really cannot bitch about basically ANY vote for center, but if Al Jefferson got any forward votes, that is a crime.

There were people who HONESTLY believed that Noah, Bargnani, Bosh, Iggy, Wallace, Scola and Deng had better years than Aldridge or Randolph? Do these people WATCH basketball? Eric Gordon? Can you play like 55 games and be all-NBA?

I know Paul Pierce has morphed into a team player, but as a player whose primary skill is scoring can you go 19-5-3 and be all-NBA? He was 7th in forward voting!!!

Dutch Treat

For some unknown reason -- 434 hits from The Netherlands this week!!

Rik Smits anyone?

Blogger Finally Back

My lord, shut down for 2 days due to technical problems.

I feel like Rasheed Wallace.

Harmon Killebrew -- On His Way Out


But we will always have the statue at Target Field, the road by the Mall of America, and the seat hanging in the MOA where he hit the mammoth home run at Met Stadium.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Why Did the Heat Spend $30MM on Mike Miller and his NEGATIVE 3 PER?


As the playoffs continue and LeBron plays 95% of every game, the question really has to be ripping at the souls of knowledgeable Heat fans (there are 17 of you out there who know basketball, right? Hello?).

Miller, signed for 5 years and $30MM, was always a bizarre signing. Your two best guys will play 72 minutes a night (Bron and Wade) so that leaves 24 minutes for both of their backups, combined. Miller cannot guard an off guard, so he is limited to 12 minutes a night, at best.

In important games, LeBron and Wade will get 80-85 minutes. So that leaves 13-18 for both of their backups combined. Again, why are you paying one of these two backups $30MM?

Miller's PER in the playoffs? Negative 3.0. Negative. I will now look up some super sucky player -- oh yeah, Jonny Flynn, 4th worst season ever, his PER: positive 7. I have looked at some of the shittiest players on the shittiest NBA rosters, and I find NO ONE with a negative PER.

So, let's just do a search. Well, hard as it is to believe, there are worse playoff efforts on record:
http://bkref.com/tiny/WLCcE Just not many. And not by guys making $30MM over the next 5 years.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Vikes to..............Arden Hills?????

1. Population? -- 9,900

2. Best feature that warrants a $1B investment? -- has available land.

3. Why does it have available land if it is only 10 miles from Minneapolis? -- because there is a former munitions dump there and all of the property is toxically polluted!!

4. Are there existing good roads that will take me right to the stadium location? Not really.

5. The most affluent suburbs in the Twin Cities are South and West of the cities, so where is this location? -- mostly north, a little east.

In short, this is a "just add water" idea to put a massive stadium project where nothing currently is (or for that matter, wants to be).

I guess it COULD work...........or be a horrible disaster similar to Springfield spending all of its money on a Monorail.


bin Laden Used "Natural Viagra" -- I Have Located a Picture!

Eastern Europe's Favorite Cat and Mouse Team -- Worker and Parasite

Erin Andrews - Kentucky Derby

People tell me she was wearing a hat.

Monday, May 09, 2011

Big Minutes This Morning In Memphis

Westbrook, Durant, Zach Randolph, Marc Gasol, all over 50 minutes. (LeBron also goes 50 minutes for Miami in another game).

Durant, ZBo, Gasol, all over 55 minutes.

3 guys over 55 minutes in the same playoff game??? Third time in 20 years, other two times -- the Bulls were involved:

June 19, 1993 -- NBA Finals -- rare loss by Michael at home
1 Michael Jordan G 1993-06-13 CHI PHO Loss 1game started 57minutes played
2 Dan Majerle G 1993-06-13 PHO @ CHI W 1 59
3 Scottie Pippen F 1993-06-13 CHI PHO L 1 56
4 Kevin Johnson G 1993-06-13 PHO @ CHI W 1 62
5 B.J. Armstrong G 1993-06-13 CHI PHO L 1 58

WOW -- five guys played 56+

I include the next set of guys to show Gasol and Randolph that they are not alone in being big guys going over 55 minutes.

6 Kenyon Martin F 2002-05-02 NJN IND W 1 56

7 Peja Stojakovic F 2003-05-10 SAC DAL L 1 56
8 Dirk Nowitzki F 2003-05-10 DAL @ SAC W 1 58

Wife beaters can play big minutes also:
9 Jason Kidd G 2004-05-14 NJN @ DET W 1 57

April 30, 2009, was I drinking a $10 beer with K when this game was being won by the Bulls?
10 Ray Allen G 2009-04-30 BOS @ CHI L 1 59
11 John Salmons G 2009-04-30 CHI BOS W 1 60
12 Derrick Rose G 2009-04-30 CHI BOS W 1 59
13 Rajon Rondo G 2009-04-30 BOS @ CHI L 1 58

Oldest player to go 50+ minutes in a playoff game in the last 20 years? Sam Cassell, age 36 1/2 http://bkref.com/tiny/RNoIk

Centers prior to Marc Gasol to log 50+ minutes in a playoff game? http://bkref.com/tiny/IsVe0

The all-time greats and........Eldon Campbell??????????

Rich Wing -- Romney; Poor Wing -- Palin

I have a lot of friends who are smart and wealthy Republicans. I don't blame these people for being Republicans. They are looking out for their own financial interest and they really don't give a fuck about other people. Ok, fine. Be that way. But at least it makes some sense.

The "Poor Wing" however -- they are morons. They vote against their own best interest because Joel Osteen or Pat Robertson or (fill in name of some actual modern relevant preacher) tells them that God wants them to.

Proof of this? College educated GOP -- little support for the idiot Sarah Palin. Rich people -- less support for Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann is almost in last place with these people.

Among GOP people making under $24,000 (who for some reason really fear Obama will "raise my taxes" -- which "I" don't pay any, but anyway) Palin leads Romney 22 to 9, and Michele Bachmann(!!!) almost matches Romney (7 to 9).

What I have said for some time: the likely winner -- Hucklebuckle. He has across the board support. Not real strong support, but no single group really hates him. He just has to watch out when he says stuff like "Tax cuts for millionaires would not be my #1 priority." Uh, Mikey, you are a Republican -- tax cuts for the super wealthy is your first, next and only priority. Just remember that.


Andrew Bynum on J.J. Berea

Bill Simmons Tweets On the Lakers

@sportsguy33 Wow! I never thought the gutless walkout of the '91 Pistons would be topped but it's happening! about 20 hours ago

@sportsguy33 Kobe's 4th mega-blowout in a closing game since 2003: '03: 28 pts. '06: 31 pts. '08: 39 pts. '11: ?? (In '04 Finals: they lost by 13.) about 20 hours ago

@sportsguy33 I hate the Lakers and even I don't want Phil Jackson's career to end with his team quitting on him. about 21 hours ago

@sportsguy33 This would be a stunning sweep. On paper, LA has 4 of the best 5 players in the series. Their 4th best player (Odom) would be #2 for Dallas. about 21 hours ago

Where Does Dirk Nowitzki Rank On the All-Time List???

If you judge true greatness by the combination of performance, winning and longevity, you would assume that the category "Career Win Shares" would give us a list of the greatest NBA players of all-time. Here is what basketball-reference.com tells us (stars represent Hall of Famers):

1. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar* 273.41
2. Wilt Chamberlain* 247.26
3. Karl Malone* 234.62
4. Michael Jordan* 214.02
5. John Stockton* 207.70
6. Oscar Robertson* 189.21
7. Shaquille O'Neal 181.71
8. David Robinson* 178.67
9. Charles Barkley* 177.21
10. Kevin Garnett 174.68
11. Reggie Miller 174.40
12. Tim Duncan 170.00
13. Moses Malone* 167.07
14. Bill Russell* 163.51
15. Hakeem Olajuwon* 162.77
16. Jerry West* 162.58
17. Dirk Nowitzki 161.30
18. Kobe Bryant 156.27
19. Magic Johnson* 155.79
20. Robert Parish* 147.00
21. Larry Bird* 145.83
22. Gary Payton 145.53

So, yeah, Dirk is currently ahead of Kobe, and he is currently outplaying Kobe in annual Win Shares (11 to 10 this year), so he could end up ahead of Kobe. Assume Dirk plays 4 more years and gets 40 more win shares. He could end up 6th all-time in Win Shares! Behind the 2 greatest players of all-time (Jordan and Wilt) and three guys who played into their 40s.

That said, is Dirk more of a Rafael Palmeiro or Eddie Murray type who really wasn't that super awesome, but who was productive over a long, long period of time? Well, he has been 1st team all-NBA 4 times, second team 4 times, 3rd team once, and he has one coming this year (either first or second team).

One way of judging the dominance and long-term greatness of a player is to judge their MVP voting performance. So, here goes:

1. Michael Jordan* 8.138
2. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar* 6.203
3. Larry Bird* 5.693
4. Magic Johnson* 5.129
5. Bill Russell* 4.827
6. Shaquille O'Neal 4.380
7. Karl Malone* 4.296
8. Wilt Chamberlain* 4.269
9. Tim Duncan 4.205
10. Kobe Bryant 3.763
11. LeBron James 3.502
12. David Robinson* 3.123
13. Moses Malone* 2.873
14. Kevin Garnett 2.752
15. Bob Pettit* 2.628
16. Hakeem Olajuwon* 2.611
17. Oscar Robertson* 2.479
18. Charles Barkley* 2.438
19. Steve Nash 2.423
20. Jerry West* 2.090
21. Dirk Nowitzki 1.801
22. Elgin Baylor* 1.659
23. Allen Iverson 1.567

Using this criterion, it appears that Dirk, with 4 more good years where he finished top 5 in the MVP, could pick up about 1 MVP share and reach 13th or 14th all-time.

He would be slightly better or slightly worse than KG and Moses. Better than Barkley, worse than Karl Malone.

Now, let's be clear here, Dirk has always been a very mediocre defender, a middling rebounder, and a just-average passer. His primary skill set is shooting and creating his own shot.

His career numbers of around 22-9-3 certainly do not match up with the all-time greats, and he has ZERO titles (including a horrendous loss in the finals to Miami).

So -- I guess time for a new poll question.

Kobe Bryant and The Lakers Theme Song

Uh Oh! Is This Blog Really Worth It?

Um, in the last 24 hours my Web site has received 39 page views from --------- Iran.

Let me be clear here -- those of you out there who are maybe not so fond of Mr. bin Laden's death -- this is primarily an entertainment Web site, designed to amuse and entertain. I mean you jihadists no harm -- I am a "live and let live" guy....
especially the "live" part.

Praise Allah!


Sunday, May 08, 2011

Peja - 2 assists!! Charles Jones still holds NBA record

Peja after game 3 had 212 minutes with no assists. Moved ahead of Tyrone Hill and 25 minutes short of Charles Jones' 237.

Sadly, he has not one but 2 today so Charles Jones - sleep easier tonight.

Friday, May 06, 2011

Gig Gangel 2011

Do yourself a favor, male readers. When you get a chance, search for pics of 1980 Playmate Gig Gangel.......pics from 1980......

Here she is from a 2010 event and in a 1979 Playboy cover with Burt Reynolds.

Paul McCartney -- Third time's the Charm?


The triumph of optimism over experience.

Hidden Nugget -- Danny Fortson's 2004-05 Playoff Season

In his entire career, Danny Fortson played in the playoffs only one year: 2004-05 with Seattle. His statistics during that 11 game playoff run are nothing short of astounding


2004-05 11 105 12 21 12 15 5 26 0 3 1 13 42 36 .571 .800

THE GOOD -- Fortson played about 9 minutes a game. He shot 57% from the floor and 80% from the line, he got about 2.5 rebounds a game and actually tried on defense (3 steals, 1 block).

The BAD -- 0 assists in 11 games and 105 minutes.

THE VERY VERY UGLY -- Fortson had 13 turnovers to go with his 0 assists. He also committed 42 fouls -- 4 per game. If you multiply Fortson's stats by 4 to approximate a 40 minute performance, he would have committed 16 fouls a game and turned the ball over 4 times a game while NEVER registering an assist. His turnover percentage is estimated at 32% (turns the ball over once per every three times he touched it).

Should have been on my all-time worst assist to turnover performances.


The ridiculous foul rate by Fortson, however, does not approach the foul rate of almost 5 per game in under 10 minutes a game by Antoine Carr during the 1998-99 playoffs. Jim McIlvaine anyone? Don Reid? Pat Cummings?

Peja Stojakovic Edges past Okafor -- No Assists in 189 Minutes of Playoff Action


Peja had a real simple pass to Dirk the other night where Dirk could have shot it right away. Dirk held, and held, and held (probably negating the assist in any event) then missed an 18 footer. When the ball left Peja's hands I was worried that the quest for 300 minutes of no-assist playoff basketball (and/or the all-time record) was in danger.

Peja now at 189 consecutive minutes in one season of playoffs without an assist. As best I can tell, thanks to the good people at basketball-reference.com, this is 3rd place all-time. He now needs only 8 minutes to surpass Tyrone Hill, then it is on to Charles Jones' 237 minute mark (the current record).

On a games basis, Peja's 8th game without an assist only puts him in a 21-way tie for 33rd on the "most games without an assist" list.

Maybe I Was Wrong to Sell Kate Middleton's Sexiness Short????

The little girl obviously does not like rhythmic slurping sounds....Odd and kinky, but I guess it is good to be (the future) King.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Oil Plummets $10 a Barrel


I am sure gas will be only $3.50 a gallon on my drive home, right? I mean, when oil goes up $10 a gallon prices at the pump increase within 10 minutes, so I am sure they will plummet today.......yeah, sure.

KFAN Babe Bracket final 2011 -- Brooklyn Decker v. Kate Upton

Let's be blunt here, when you have two women over 5'8" tall and under 130 pounds whose last number on their breast measurement is "D", is there really a loser to be found.

I go with Decker because she is 24. She has maintained her ridiculous heat over 6 more years than has Upton. Plus she has a 24 inch waist to Upton's 25.

Pippa Middleton Raises an Interesting Question


Her sister Kate is taller, better hair, prettier face. Stand them next to each other and Kate is just the better choice.......if they are clothed. I would say Kate is 9 face 8 body 8 doability while Pippa is 7 face, 8 body, 10 doability. A facebook rating tie of 25.

So let me ask you, dear readers -- what is more important to attracting a male -- being prettier or being hotter?

Even if you do not agree with me on the Kate/Pippa rating, do you/guys generally agree that in picking a serious relationship partner that you would rather have the slightly less hot slut rather than the prettier princess???

Any answer welcome (except for, "I would do them both" or equivalent -- that is not helpful).

More bin laden Info -- "Guns Nearby"


Look, they were never going to capture this guy unless when they landed he had a TV crew filming him and was standing under a sign saying "I give up, please capture me" while waving a huge white flag with a size akin to what you would see at a college sporting event.

The addition of the whole, "They might have suicide vests" story line makes capture virtually impossible. If a guy has a suicide vest on, would anyone in their right mind capture him and put him on a helicopter they were in? Come on.

The son of a bitch is dead and today is being ganged raped in hell by evil westerners and evil Jewish men who were also sent to hell. Tomorrow the other guys get their turn to receive. Good riddance.

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Rashard Mendenhall -- Still Pro-bin Laden


Remarkably, he states both that his tweets were misconstrued AND that he still believes 100% in what he said....which is 100% of what people complained about him saying.

Therefore, Mendenhall finds an odd place in my athlete evaluation: he did not back off of what he thought was true........but he also did 100% back off of what he said......

So, yeah -- confusing.

James -- New Girl "100 Percent" Better Than Bullock In bed


Wait until she is married to you a while, buddy. Just you wait........

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

Rashard Mendenhall -- Pro-Terrorism

From his Twitter Page:

What kind of person celebrates death? It's amazing how people can HATE a man" they have never even heard speak. We've only heard one side…"

One side of what? Does someone contest that he is dead? Does someone contest that he was the head of Al Quaida? No. In fact, he was very, very proud to be a terroist leader who killed Westerners. So, not sure what "other side" Mendenhall could want -- other than the one that justifies killing innocent people through acts of terrorism.

"We'll never know what really happened. I just have a hard time believing a plane could take down a skyscraper demolition style"

This sort of misses the point altogether. Bin Laden took full responsibility for 9/11 and never denied it. So........I guess he is just a liar, not a killer? At the very least, he encouraged others to do the same thing that was done.

(at former Illinois basketball player Dominique Keller)

"I believe in God. I believe we're ALL his children. And I believe HE is the ONE and ONLY judge."

"Those who judge others, will also be judged themselves."

"For those of you who said you want to see Bin Laden burn in hell and p--- on his ashes, I ask how would God feel about your heart?"

The interesting thing about this set of entries, is that it really pushes the envelope for forgiveness. Mendenhall, apparently, is a FAR left winger who REALLY believes in forgiveness for all. What Rashard, perhaps, should remember is that the religious folk all seem to agree that there has to be a hell to go along with a heaven. There simply is not sufficient punishment out there available to the church if ultimately everyone goes to heaven. So, I guess you could credit Rashard with a truly truly kind outlook on the world where everything happens for a reason and no one is really to "blame" for anything because it is all part of God's plan. But boy - if bin Laden doesn't go to hell, and he is not worthy of being condemned, then I guess the slave traders of the 17th and 18th centuries are, likewise, waiting for Rashard in heaven, where they will all eventually be close friends with Roger Goodell.........and Osama.

"There is not an ignorant bone in my body. I just encourage you to #think."

Read more: http://aol.sportingnews.com/nfl/story/2011-05-03/rooney-responds-to-mendenhalls-tweets-about-bin-laden?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl4%7Csec1_lnk3%7C60193#ixzz1LJl3ffdD

Evanston rejects Tilted Kilt -- TK Refused Request for "Alternative Uniforms"

I, too, agree with the opinion of Evanston Mayor Elizabeth Tisdahl. I feel everything in America has gone awry since they allowed tennis player Doris Hart (pictured) to sport her scandalous outfits in the early 1950's. Sleeveless, above the knee, my lord.

Mo Connolly took it from there, and now we just have anarchy in the world of women's fashions. Someone had to turn the clock back to pre-flapper 1919, and Mayor Tisdahl, it is you! Congrats.

However, do we really need the plunging neck line on that blue shirt? Flashdance anyone?

Peja -- 165 Minutes, 1 Turnover


He is no Steve Kerr (2 years of play, 379 minutes, 1 turnover one year, 0 the next), but Peja has a chance at surpassing Horace Grant and Lindsey Hunter for second best 1 turnover playoff effort.

(Note that Peja's inability or unwillingness to get an assist is even more amazing when a guy like Kerr or Grant could register double figure assists in similar minutes with similar turnovers).

Peja Stoyakovic "No Assists" watch -- Up to 165 Minutes


4th most playoff minutes in a set of playoffs all-time without an assist!! Blew past Happy Hairston and now has his eye set on (the basket) and Emeka Okafor for 3rd most.

Charles Jones and Tyrone Hill have to start looking in the rear view mirror as well!

Babe Bracket 2011 Final 4 -- Marissa Miller, Sophia Vergara, Brooklyn Decker and Kate Upton


Dallas and Lakers - No Win Series For Me.

Two of my most hated basketball personalities duking it out, plus wife-beating Jason Kidd. Great. Rooting for a 7 game series with a ton of injuries.

How Well is Jamal Crawford Playing In the Playoffs?? Better Than Kobe.

And AMAZINGLY well! Look at the names of guards (who at the time were) around Crawford's current age, with at least 7 playoff games played, and a PER around the 23.9 Crawford has put up thus far:

1 Michael Jordan* 6-6 1994-95 PER 24.8

2 Manu Ginobili 6-6 2004-05 PER 24.8

3 Jerry West* 6-2 1965-66 PER 24.7

4 Kobe Bryant 6-6 2009-10 PER 24.7

5 Jamal Crawford 6-6 2010-11 PER 23.9

6 Allen Iverson 6-0 2002-03 PER 23.5

7 Ray Allen 6-5 2004-05 PER 23.5

8 Perry Moss 6-2 1986-87 PER 23.4

9 Steve Nash 6-3 2004-05 PER 23.4

10 Magic Johnson 6-8 1988-89 PER 23.4

11 Kobe Bryant 6-6 2010-11 PER 23.1

12 Gary Payton 6-4 1997-98 PER 23.0

Give me a 1 to 100 rating on...........A Slimmed Down Jordin Sparks

1 -- hideous, would kill myself if I even was forced to make out with her for 5 minutes.

25 -- if she was the last girl at the bar at closing time and wanted me, I would buy a dirty magazine instead.

50 - I wouldn't be proud, but I have made out with worse.

75 -- would be very proud to have a shot at that

100 -- would have relations with her in front of my spouse or significant other and not worry about the reaction.

Monday, May 02, 2011

Thank You President Bush............For Giving Up!?!?

My favorite guy last night at the White House rally was the guy sporting the "Thank you President Bush" shirt.

Um, how deep in the closet did this guy have to go to pull out this baby? Were there 5 steamer trunks in his mom's basement with old clothes from 2003 that he was able to scour and find this gem?

Was this guy paid $20,000 back in 2002 and told, "OK, so when we capture or kill bin Laden, here is your shirt to wear; run down to the White House and start jumping around wildly!" Hey, a deal is a deal! He got paid in 2002, he honored the deal in 2011.

Why did we never capture bin laden under the GWB reign of error? Well, some cynics like Michael Moore suggest that the Bush family's ties with the bin Laden family actually made capture or killing highly unlikely. If I were hunting TEG or K's family member, I probably would not be overly aggressive about it.

That said, what do we KNOW about George W. Bush's efforts to get bin Laden? We know that after early 2002 he barely tried: http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2011_05/029221.php

As Steve Benen noted:

March 2002, just six months after 9/11, Bush said of bin Laden, "I truly am not that concerned about him.... You know, I just don't spend that much time on him, to be honest with you."

In July 2006, we learned that the Bush administration closed its unit that had been hunting bin Laden.

In September 2006, Bush told Fred Barnes, one of his most sycophantic media allies, that an "emphasis on bin Laden doesn't fit with the administration's strategy for combating terrorism."

And don't even get me started on Bush's failed strategy that allowed bin Laden to escape from Tora Bora.

I'm happy to extend plenty of credit to all kinds of officials throughout the government, but crediting Bush's "vigilance" on bin Laden is deeply silly.

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Osama bin Laden - dead

Or so they say......he is probably in Michigan with 76 year old Elvis.