Friday, August 30, 2013

The Worst Players to Log 765 NBA Games or More

LeBron's 765 games played got me thinking -- he appears to be the 2nd best player ever to log 765 games, but who are the WORST guys who have logged 765 games?

here you go:

11th worst   Jon Koncak - no, it wasn't just the ridiculous contract he signed, he was a far below average player as well.

10.  Rory Sparrow - keep your eye on the Sparrow.....if you wanted to see a combo guard who wasn't any good.

9.  Chris Dudley - when you shoot like 40% from the line, it hurts your advanced statistics....a lot...

8. Mark Bryant - tough.  If you took an MMA perfomer who was 6'9" and put him on the court, you would get similar production.

7.  Brian Shaw - played with a lot of good teams and logged a lot of minutes...........he shouldn't have.  Right places, right times.  Well below average player.

6.  Anthony Johnson -- every once in a while you look out on an NBA court and say, "Well, that can't be THE ___________, he'd be like 35 and he sucked...."  Anthony Johnson epitomizes the player that creates that situation.


5.  Calbert Cheaney -- I once sat in a cab in Memphis and noted that Keith Lee got picked in the draft.  Cabbie says, "Nice kid, good to him momma, cannot play a lick."  Like Calbert Cheaney.

4.  Howard Eisley -- he went from sucking in Minnesota to playing quite well for like 18 months for Utah, then he went right back to sucking for a long, long time.

3.  Joe Kleine -- see Mark Bryant, then add two inches, then subtract 15% of his ability.  Should be noted that while Stockton, Malone, Terry Porter and Barkley were sitting home in 1984, Joe was playing with Jeff Turner on the U.S. Olympic team.

2.  Jacque Vaughn - wow.  He was so awful.

1.  DeShawn Stevenson -- I find it interesting that this guy has logged so much time in the NBA despite being a bad guy, a statutory rapist, and being last on the list in Win Shares, last on the list in WS/48 (by a lot, he is at .032, second worst is .050) and 2nd worst in PER (to Koncak).  In the history of the game, even if you reduce the minutes played down to 13,000, there are only 4 guys who even can be consider in the same ballpark as DeShawn (one being Howard Komives).

DeShawn Stevenson has had SIX (6) season where he has ended the year with over 500 minutes played and NEGATIVE overall Win Shares!!!!!  6!  Since 1979, only 2 guys have had even 4 such seasons -- Bobby Hurley and Michael Olowokandi.

I just cannot figure it out.  There are currently 78 active players with at least 18,000 minutes played.  Kevin Garnett has 187 Win Shares, DeShawn Stevenson has 12.  Chris Paul has .244 WS/48, DeShawn has 0.032.

Monthly LeBron Entry

Even in the off season, I need a monthly LeBron Entry.

1) Do a search for players with 765 games played or more and averages equal to or better than LeBron's 27.6/6.9/7.3. 
Answer -- none.  No one.

2) Do a search for 765 games played and PER of 27.6, Win Shares greater than 152 and WS/48 greater than .24.
Answer -- two guys.  LeBron James and Michael Jordan.  Jordan defensive stats are better, shooting stats very similar, James slight edge in assisting and rebounding.

Edge:  Jordan - played 300 more games and yet still had a higher PER and higher WS/48 (this even includes his ill-fated time with the Wiz).

3) Do a search to look at people equal to or better than James' 138 playoff games - 27.3 PER, 29.5 WS, 0.238 WS/48.

Answer - two guys, LeBron James and Michael Jordan.  Again, Jordan gaining the slight edge due to a 41 extra games played advantage plus a slightly higher WS and WS/48.

(It should be noted that on a per minute basis George Mikan was equal to James as well; he just did not play long enough to reach the WS volume of Jordan or James).

Sooooooooooooooooo - a pretty good argument could be made that Jordan is the best player of all time, and James is #2.

Whose Body?

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

RKG Provides "Best Porn By State"

It just seems hard (pun intended) to believe that the top search in certain states is "creampie." But look at all of the states where that is #1! How about Missouri offering up teen porn as its fave?

It must be quite a shock for GC Boy to move from Missouri (teen) to NC (MILF).  I mean, given his age, it seems like a step in the right direction, but still.  And if you think that the Alabama and Georgia searches for "ebony" are by black guys, think again.

PAR and the K undoubtedly skew the MILF result in Illinois, give they are 3% of total searches.  But at their ages, they are still searching for trophy women.  Wisconsin search for "teen" is probably a good idea since after age 19 in WI there are like zero good looking native women.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Lamar Odom -- Gee, When Did He Start Hitting the Crack Pipe???

Rumor is that Lamar Odom has a crack problem.

Odom married Khloe Kardashian in September of 2009.  His playing stats were good in 2009-10 and very good in 2010-11.

In 2010-11, there were 16 guys in the league who accounted for more than 10 Win Shares.  Lamar Odom was #16.

Of those 16 guys, Odom was more productive per minute than was Kobe:  How good was Lamar Odom in 2010-11?  He was palying at roughly the same level as Kevin Durant.  Wow.

In May of 2011, the Lakers were embarrassed in a 4 game sweep by Dallas (who went on to win the title over LeBron).  Odom was not good.  But it is hard to say that he was any worse than Pau Gasol, who was unbelievable during the regular season and awful against Dallas (he looked hypnotized).  Kobe's playoff stats in 2011?  .099 WS/48.  That is dreadful for an alleged "star" player.

So we cannot say for sure that Odom was impacted by crack usage in 2011......but then he goes to Dallas.  Oh boy.

In 2011-12, Odom was one of the 8 worst players in the entire league who played at least 700 minutes.  He went from Kevin Durant to Damien Wilkens/Rashard Lewis/Xavier Henry.

You would have to think that Odom had some SERIOUS drug problems going on.  I mean, imagine going from being a top 16 performer to a bottom of the barrel performer in one year.  One year.  Going from 6.1 Offensive Win Shares to NEGATIVE OWS!! 

I cannot even imagine how to search for players going from good to sucky that quickly.  How do you cross reference that?  I would imagine that former Wolves Mike James and Chuck Person might have similar turns as "good to awful" but

The Most Disturbing Performance I Have Ever Seen - Miley Cyrus at VMAs

I have been to a lot of bars where 0.30% alcohol fat chicks are humping 290 pound 5'6" guys, and that was not nearly as disturbing.  At least those people were honestly seeking out human affection, not humping a foam finger. 

And how can someone who weighs 98 pounds have 25% body fat?  The shot of her ass walking away screamed out "75 year old grandma."

I am still traumatized.

Friday, August 23, 2013

11 Signs of a Sociopath

When I was in law school, I dated a girl who could lie right straight to your face and show absolutely no sign that she was telling a lie or felt bad about doing so.

She did a lot of bizarre things (including constantly telling me that she knew people who could have me killed and saying that I left the cabinet door open again she would take a knife and stab me).  But lying so well was the only one that really scared the living hell out of me.  "OK, [name of girl] let's go to the grocery store...."  What?  "Well, you said 5 minutes ago that you wanted to go."  No, I did not.  "Well, wait, you did."  No. 
Then I would stare at her and she would wait 20 seconds and say, "see how well I lie."  Jesus.  Yeah, real funny.  I forgot I had Torts homework tonight....see ya!

Allen Iverson - Quitter

Sure, he stopped playing in the NBA three years ago, but still.........

His stats:

Iverson is a guy who is (and long has been) a bone of contention between people who use the "eyeball test" and people who concentrate on advanced statistical analysis.   Under the eyeball test, he is arguably one of the top 10 players in the past 20 years (league MVP, 11 time all-star, brought his team to the NBA Finals), but under the microscope of advanced statistical analysis, Iverson really suffers.

Iverson is regarded by many as a great offensive player.  He won 4 scoring titles.  His 26.67PPG career average ranks him behind only Michael, Wilt, LeBron, Elgin Baylor and Jerry West on the all-time list.  11 times he finished in the top 8 in the league in scoring. 

AI was a HUGE minutes guy.  Only Wilt, Russell and Oscar played more minutes per game.  The two biggest minute eaters who are active are LeBron and Durant, but both are very young, so their minutes will decline.  Joe Johnson and Kobe are huge minutes guys, but they have toiled 4 less minutes per game than AI.

Now, move over to PER and Win Shares, and Iverson looked pretty average.  He was in the top 10 in the league in PER only 3 times.  He was in the top 10 in Win Shares only three seasons (always 10th) and in the top 10 in Offensive Win Shares only once (finishing 8th in 2007-08).

In the history of the NBA, there have been 27 guys who have been 11+ times named to the All-Star Game.  On that list, Iverson ranks 25th in total Win Shares (ahead of Bob Cousy and Isiah Thomas) and 25th in Win Shares per 48 (ahead of Elvin Hayes and Isiah Thomas).

In the history of the NBA, there have only been 45 guys who have logged at least 37,000 minutes.
Iverson ranks 36th in total Win Shares and 34th in Win Shares Per 48.  He does rank 18th in career PER of these guys, above Paul Pierce and below Patrick Ewing.

Iverson shot 42% from the floor and 31% from 3.  His value as a player was primarily his ability to stay on the floor and his ability to always create an opportunity for himself and his teammates.

Of players with more than 10,000 NBA minutes, only 3 players have ever averaged more than 26 points and more than 6 assists a game -- Jerry West, LeBron James, and AI.  The scoring and assists stats of Larry Bird and Dwyane Wade do not match up to Iverson.  (For those wondering, as I was, where Chris Paul is - he doesn't even average 20 PPG for his career).

So what is our summary on Iverson?  Top 50 all-time player.  I am sorry, but you just cannot ignore the raw numbers.  11 AS appearances, 26-6, 4th most minutes played per game, decent defender, took a team to the Finals, MVP of the league.

Top 25 player?  I would say no.  So I would put him around the 37th best player in league history, which is certainly a great honor.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Gia Allemand - Suicide by Hanging

Look, I tell this to my kids whenever there is a suicide that is publicized -- tomorrow is another day.  There is nothing in a relationship or an embarrassment or whatever that is worth killing yourself over.

So you think your NBA player boyfriend is dumping you or treating you poorly or whatever - move along.  You are 29.  Tomorrow the sun will come up and he will not be around, but you know what?  You can live another 70 years.  During that period of time, you will have a lot of great and happy times.  Why give all of that away and hurt everyone who loves you so much and wants things to go well for you?

Awful.  Just awful.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

19 Divas - One Total Eclipse of the Heart

Very well done.

This Is The Point We Have Reached on "Breaking Bad"

The kid has probably never kissed a girl or been in love or had sex.  He will never be married or watch his kids be born.  The thing he misses most about dying at age 16?  He won't be able to watch the Breaking Bad finale.

Can we gain some perspective here, folks?  There were under 6 million viewers for this week's Breaking Bad episode.  Roughly 500,000 more than "Rizzoli and Isles" and 800,000 more than "Pawn Stars"

Hatfields & McCoys averaged 14 million viewers over three nights. 

This just about says it all:

Monday, August 12, 2013

Sears Offering Bondage Gear


Dufner -- Whatja Gonna Do When I Smack That Ass?

As someone whose wife is also much better looking than I am, I commend Dufner for this action -- you just like to know that there is this much-hotter person out there who will let you do this from time to time.

Nice work, Duf-man!

Friday, August 09, 2013

Erin Andrews and Charissa Thompson

Damn it, I am gonna do nothing but watch FoxSports1 every day for the rest of the year!

Being a Lesbian? "That's So Raven"

She could sense it in her visions -- she kept seeing Ellen.

The 1984 NBA Finals and the 3 point shot

I watched Game 5 of the 1984 NBA Finals on TV the other night.  Some things you take away from that game:

1) Bird was at the height of his powers - my lord was he good.

2) The Lakers relied very heavily on Kareem.  He was 7 of 25 for the game, yet they were going to him every time down.

3) Magic, I am sorry to say it Magic, but he didn't do much.  If you look at Magic's Game Log for that Finals, in Games 5 and 7 he was 8 of 23.  Imagine LeBron James going 8 of 23 in losses in Games 5 and 7.   You don't have to imagine, in 2011, LeBron was 20 for 45 in Games 3-4-5 as Miami lost.  He was seen as the worst player ever to play basketball.  Even if you throw in a good Game 6 for Magic in 1984, he was 18-41 in Games 5-7.    Both men were 44%, and I can guarantee you, LeBron was playing far superior defense and not tossing the ball into Kareem in the post every possession.

4) The biggest thing I noticed was how many times guys were jacking up closely guarded two-point shots.  Dennis Johnson, seemingly every time down, was shooting a 17 footer while his guy narrowly missed blocking it. 

As we know in modern days, the closely guarded long two point shot is a bad shot.  That was apparently not the rule in 1984, because anyone (closely guarded or not) was allowed to hoist any 15-20 foot jumper they could find.

Why?  No one ever took a 3 point shot.   In the 2012-13 playoffs, LeBron James took 96 3 point attempts.  In the 1984 playoffs, Larry Bird took 17.

The underuse of the 3 point shot was obvious from watching the game, but the disparity between 1984 and 29 years later is stunning when you consider that Bird's offensive stats and LeBron's offensive stats over their careers are frighteningly similar.  But LeBron takes nearly 6 times as many 3s?  Is it LeBron and Bird, or is it the game?

It is the game.

From 1979-90 in the playoffs 24 time a guy took 40 or more 3 pointers in a playoff run.

From 1991-2002 --    172 times

From 2003-Present -- 287 times.

It is difficult to identify exactly when the big change occurred (there are some years in the more modern times where no one took 40+ threes), but I look to the 1994-95 Rockets.  They went with the game where they tossed it in to Hakeem and he got the ball out and they just jacked a ton of 3s.  I think it was then that the league realized that playing 4 out and 1 in was the best decision.  I also think that the growth in statistical analysis in recent years has alerted coaches to the fact that shooting a 21 footer at a rate of 35% is a terrible shot when you can get a 24 footer at 33% that counts 150% of the 21 footer.

Monday, August 05, 2013

9 Greatest NBA Non-All-Stars

I required 20,000 minutes of play and a PER over 15 and a WS/48 over 0.1.  Then I ranked in 3 categories:  career Win Shares, WS/48 and PER, awarding 10 for a first-place finish, down to 1 for a 10th place finish.

Only 1 guy appeared on all 3 lists (he is #1).  The other guys appeared in the top 10 twice.

9.  Toni Kukoc (10 points)

8. and 7. (tie)   Corey Maggette and Don Nelson 11 points)

6. and 5. (tie) Cornbread Maxwell and Jason Terry (13 points)

4 and 3 and 2 (tie) Sam Perkins and Andre Miller and Rod Strickland (16 points).

Best NBA Player to Never Be Named an All-Star:

#1 -- Marcus Camby 6th all-time in Win Shares for non-AS; 3rd in PER and 6th in WS/48.
18 points

Not bad for a guy who was so terrible in Toronto his second year in the league that he was traded for 34 year old Charles Oakley, Sean Marks and cash.

A-Rod Gets 211 Game Suspension

I hope it sticks.

Why Strippers Should NOT be Independent Contractors

Thursday, August 01, 2013

Video on Porn v. Real Sex

What sort of search results am I gonna get for this?

Riley Cooper - Racist. (Video)

"I was drinking." -- he doesn't look like he was drunk.  "I said some things I shouldn't."  OK.  "I have apologized."  Again, OK.

This is WAAAAAAAAAAAAY different than the Paula Deen stuff.  She is an old white plantation owner who lived during actual de jure segregation in The South.  Of course she called black people niggers.  Goes without saying.  This guy is like 25 years old and works every single day with a 75-80% African-American group of peers.  That he would get upset at one security guard and threaten to start indiscriminately beating up "every nigger here" is a disturbing look into his soul. 

Strong stance by the Eagles - fined an undisclosed amount and told to say he is sorry.  No suspension.  No sensitivity training.  Next up for Cooper - a job at FUBU where he walks around randomly threatening co-workers.

Great stretch here for Florida.